Synapse Pathway

Interactive Installation
2023 - 2024

Synapse Pathway is an exploration of self-understanding and self-acceptance, focusing on my personal experiences with ADHD and PTSD that I've been researching during the PRIKKEL residency at buitenplaats Doornburgh. Just as the synapse pathways in our brains connect different parts together, influencing how brain cells communicate with each other, ADHD introduces its own unique pathways that can bring forth both challenges and strengths. Divided into three interactive spaces, the installation delves into the intricacies of my neurodivergent mind.

Using diverse materials and mixed media, the installation engages the audience actively, allowing them to connect with various thoughts. The connecting wooden path between the spaces encourages visitors to embark on a neurodivergent journey, actively participating in the exhibition and gaining insights into my personal exploration.

Wooden path designed by Jack Garay Arauzo.

The first space features a large mind map that covers the walls of the whole room and represents my research and thoughts during the residency. It may seem like a chaotic mess to others, but it reflects my own unique order and thought process. Here, I have transcribed my notebooks, research, to do lists and thoughts onto large pieces of paper, offering a glimpse into the inner workings of my mind.

25m2 wallpaper and markers.

Photo credits: Lize Kraan.

In the second space, I confront anxiety-inducing thoughts and phrases that often disrupt my sense of peace and relaxation. By crafting soft and comfortable puff-like objects inscribed with these phrases, I aim to embrace and accept these thoughts rather than avoid them. Through the act of cuddling and resting in these paddings, I encourage visitors to make peace with the anxieties that are an integral part of who I am. In this inviting space, spectators are urged to connect with the phrases that resonate with them personally and find solace within them.

Frases tufted in the puffs: Whatever others might think, Say no, Unreplied messages, Do nothing sometimes and Taking decisions.
Tufted puffs with wool, soft cloth and fulling.
In collaboration with Studio Bonvie.

Photo credits: Lize Kraan and Zehra Eekhout.

The third part consists of a video art trilogy titled Handle with Care. Through this series, I highlight the importance of my hands in expressing my neurodivergent self, focusing specifically on the manicure process as a significant ritual. My hands play a crucial role in my interaction with the world, serving as a channel to convey my emotions and thoughts. Each of these videos captures moments of anxiety, periods of dopamine-driven focus, and moments of independent rest.

The videos have different intensities, and they can be watched separately or together to provide a distinct experience.

Handle with Care (2023), co-directed with Daniela Schoorl and edited by Daniela Schoorl and Maike Moll. 
Each video art lasts 4:07min independently.

Photo credits: Lize Kraan and Daniela Schoorl.

Deviation from the usual path unveils a window with a view of the tranquil inner garden. Yet, the calm is disrupted by Soundscape Alchemy, an audio installation seamlessly blending bird sounds from Buitenplaats Doornburgh into a vibrant reggaeton mix. This artistic moment mirrors my experience—initial silence proves distracting, compelling the need for loud music to find concentration and calm amid the dynamic setting.

Sound Alchemy, produced by Adrián León Lostaunau.

Spatial design of the installation and mind map drawing: 

Spatial design of the installation designed by Jack Garay Arauzo.


This project was supported by Stichting Stokroos, HKU and Buitenplaats Doornburgh.
Special thanks to Studio Bonvie, Joanna van Dorp (Buitenplaats Doornburgh), Schweigman&, HKU, UMC Utrecht and my lovelies Jack Garay Arauzo, Daniela Schoorl, Adrián León Lostaunau, Jose Hopkins Brocq, Sonia Verdiesen, Lonneke Cuppen, Molly Palmer, Sjaak Hansink and Jurrian Hansink <3.

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